36- THREE

My baby boys are three!!! Their birthday was yesterday. How on earth did that happen??

35

Valentine's day was a bust. Better luck next year

34-Kindness

Today while I was out sampling my jams at the mall, I thought a lot about kindness and how it costs you nothing but can sometimes mean everything. 

I stood at my little table offering the samples of my jams to everyone that walked by. It doesn't bother me that not everyone buys, because,  well, they just don't all buy!  A man walked up to my table wearing a super worn out shirt with holes in it, and had a look that some may not approve of. I offered him a sample, he loved my blackberry vanilla jam, and ended up purchasing a jar. I could have just not talked to him, and judged him based on appearance, but I didn't.  I didn't have to engage him in conversation because he didn't look like someone who would buy artisan jam, but I did. He was a nice young man that appreciated my product just as anyone would, and I thoroughly enjoy sharing my products with anyone that wants them.  We all know the saying, "don't judge a book by its cover" and it's really amazing the perspective you can get when you just see people as people.

33

It's 7:35pm and all 4 kids are in bed and sound asleep.  What do I even do with myself? 

I'm exhausted,  so no work will get done. But I didn't eat dinner yet so maybe I should do that.... and then eat the girl scout cookies I don't want to share!

32-Broken

Everything in this house is broken, including me.

$327 to fix a leaking pipe in the basement today. It was either that or have no water. Oh the joy it is to be a home owner.

31

Busy. That word doesn't even explain things right now! Today I made about 50 jars of beer jelly so I can take them up to the mall tomorrow and sample/sell. People will be out shopping for Broncos gear so I'm hoping to take advantage of those shoppers and sell some yummy jelly!

Thirty - A Day in the Life

Today was just one of those days that I wonder how we all survived

7:00 kids start waking up
8:20 take girls to school
8:45 back home to get boys ready for school
9:15 take boys to school
9:45 go to Walmart to but mason jars and stuff to make soup
10:30 get home and start soup
10:45 leave to pick up girls from school
11:15 back home to finish cooking soup
12:15 bring soup to friend
12:45 drive to the mall to pick up candied jalapeños  that a customer wants because I'm out at home
1:25 meet Brian at the boys school so he can wait in the parking lot while I go in and get the boys
1:40 bring soup to another friend
1:45 arrive home and kids all say they're starving. Make PBJ sandwiches
2:10 get kids down for naps
2:15 run to fabric store to get broncos fabric so the girls can wear something for Bronco Friday.
3:10 get home and Ollie hadn't napped and is still crying
3:30 call doctor to get same day appointment
4:00 get to the doctors office
4:30 leave doctors  office with antibiotic prescription.  Double ear infection for Ollie
5:00 try to pick up prescription  but the insurance changed 1 letter on plan info so call them with crying kid in the background  in the Target pharmacy
5:30 get home and give antibiotic/ibuprofen
5:45 wash dishes so we have clean bowles to eat from
6:00 eat said soup
6:30 let kids watch paw patrol while I cut dresses out
7:00 put kids to bed
7:30 sew dresses
8:00 crash and zone out with my phone

Twenty Nine- School Pictures

Twenty eight

It's snowing like crazy!

In my teaching days  I hoped for a snow day. Now? I hope it's not. My kids need to go to school!!!

Twenty seven -

Let me just say that when it rains, it pours!! Brian was in the hospital for 48 hours,  and now my foot is a sore and swollen mess. We are ready for our luck to change around here, that's for sure

Twenty Six- LINKS!

I think I mentioned before that I have a small jam/jelly/sewing business so I thought I'd give you the link.  My group is called Mama's Messy Kitchen and Designs.  You can find it here

Also, I started selling Scentsy a few months ago.  If you don't have a rep you love, please shop my link here! I'm offering a free scent circle to anyone that orders something today from my "Bonus Party"

Happy Shopping!

Twenty Five- Butts

The boys had a "night of the arts" thing at their school tonight. There were ballerinas performing and they were just intrigued by them! During the performance,  Elliott asks, "Do ballerinas have butts, mom?"  I'm not even sure I answered him because it was such a silly thing to say!!!!

Twenty Four

I've been SO tired lately that I'm kind of at a loss for words!! 

My oven is broken,  so I baked a cake in my neighbor's  oven. That was the highlight of my day!!

Twenty-Three Pictures!

I'm really not in any mood to write, so I'll give you a couple pictures.  These are from my boys' 2 year pictures.  They were a little late but better late than never (turned 2 in Feb, pics in June I believe)

Twenty-Two- Connected

Its funny how even after five years, I still find infertility creeping into my life.   I have my four perfect miracles, but how they got here will never change.

I recently befriended another mom at my girls preschool.  She has a 5 year old that's in their class.  To make a long story short, she offered to drive my girls to and from school and I gladly accepted the help.  It was pretty daunting getting all 4 kids in the car, out of the car to go into the classroom, back in the car to get home.  Then the boys in the car to go pick the girls up, out of the car to go get them, back in the car to go home, and out of the car at home.  Are you tired already thinking about buckling 4 car seats that many times? Yeah, me too.  

One day when we were chatting she said something about wishing she could have more kids.  It was just a quick comment in the middle of the conversation that anyone else probably wouldn't have noticed but I was sure she had fertility issues.  Turns out that she and her husband have been trying for 3 years with no success. Shes 40 so its not super surprising, but there are many women that conceive babies at that age without issue.  Just this last Friday I invited her to a girls night out/crafting at another friend's house where we actually got to talk about things without being interrupted by 5 tiny humans.  She revealed to me that they were working on their paperwork for foster adopting an older child around their son's age or possibly a sibling group.   I'm not sure if she was scared or relieved to tell me about this, but I really wanted to tell her my story, too, so I didn't make her uncomfortable thinking I was super fertile or something because I had 4 kids.  It was a nice bonding moment, if you will, and I really give this mom a lot of credit for choosing that path.  

I shouldn't be surprised that infertility creeps up all the time, even though its not at the forefront as it once was.  Its not something I think about 24/7 anymore because I'm lucky and was able to have the family I always wanted.  Now that I'm not in that mindset anymore, I hope I can help support this friend as she goes through the ups and downs of this.  She's an amazing person for helping me out and I'd love to give to her as well. 

Twenty- One -Girls Night

It's not super often I get out without kids, but tonight I did! I have a friend that lives down the street and she had a craft night tonight at her house. We made valentine's day cards, and valentine's for the girls to bring to school! I brought along my scentsy stuff too and got a couple of orders.

There's something so fun about getting together with  a bunch of ladies :)

Twenty- Mama's Messy Kitchen

Most of my blog posts have been from my phone, but alas! I found 5 minutes to jump on my laptop.   I probably keep talking about my business, Mama's Messy Kitchen, so I just wanted to put some pictures out there to show off the fun things I've been making. If you're interested in seeing more, feel free to join my business group here!

I had a few professional pictures taken of my jams. I've since changed my packaging so I might need to get some new ones done!

Nineteen- Blankey

Chair's blanket is  completely falling apart. We had to send it to someone to get it fixed! I feel so bad! She's not a happy camper at all. Those things must have some magical power!

Eighteen

One of these days I need to figure out how to get photos attached here from my phone or jump on  my laptop. I've been sewing up SO any fun things while the kids are all at school and I'm dying to share!

It's pretty weird being home by myself because it hasn't happened in so long but the break is definitely nice.  The house isn't getting quite as messy  either since no one is here destroying it for the better part of the day.

The boys are really loving school, too.  I've really seen a difference in Elliott's behavior already!  He's listening more just toning his voice down in general.  His teacher said today was his best day so far!

Seventeen

End of the weekend!  Booo. Brian goes back to his regular work schedule this week and I'm stressed already.

Sixteen-influenster

I signed up for Influenster  a whole back. .. kind of forgot about it. Then got an email asking to take a survey to see if I fit for their product, and I did I guess!

So, today I got in the mail some Dove dry spray deodorant. Put some on and it smells pretty good!! I was tempted to try out the men's one too,  but that might be too much scent mixing lol.

Apparently you get points or something for posting on FB, IG, twitter, etc, so here I am,  telling you about my new deodorant.  I don't need a bunch of junk in the house, but I was almost out so yay for one less thing to buy! :)

Side note, who's with me here? Not sure if you're enjoying these short/random Posts but I'm sure enjoying being back and writing.... even if it's really about nothing.

Fifteen - Happy

I've felt very accomplished this week.  I got caught up on most of my sewing orders, labeled a bunch of jam and tool it to the mall, cooked more than usual,  and played lots with the kids.

Today, I went and picked up my check at the mall, took it to the bank,  and opened up a separate account just for my business stuff. When I got home, I declared we were going to the trampoline park and the kids were ecstatic!  A friend ended up joining us with her 3 kids and they all had a blast. The kids all got to burn their energy for a couple hours and I got to have some adult conversation!  We mostly talked about crafting and the kids. Oh! And she brought me fresh baked bread! (Which I just remembered is in my car!)

There was nothing amazing or spectacular  about today but it just felt like a great day.

Fourteen- free time

With the boys at school twice a week, I have actually free time!!! And it feels amazing. A couple hours to myself makes me feel like a new person!

Thirteen - The PantRy Raid

Brian is an adjunct professor,  and if you know anything about that, they don't make a ton of money. His classes end in December so he only gets a small check in the beginning of January.  What does that have to do with anything you say?

Well, let me tell you. This month we need to save money. We have to work preschool  into the budget too.

And that's where the PantRy  Raid comes in.  I'm in this cooking group, and many of us decided that this is the month to eat a bunch of stuff we already have,  and set a small weekly grocery budget. Normally we spend way too much, but we decided upon $75/week. At first, I thought there was not a chance in hell this was going to work but we are doing really well!! The new week starts on Saturday.... we have a pretty well stocked frig,  and $5 left in the budget. We've been shopping more often, but only for fresh fruits,  veggies, milk, eggs, and bread. We are actually finding ways to use everything up and waste a lot less. I find myself eating the leftovers from the kids plates instead of making my own lunch and getting creative with the random crap hiding on the shelves and in the back of the freezer.  To be fair, there hasn't been anything fancy like steak or roast,  but I've been more satisfied than I thought with the food we do have. I've had to plan ahead, and just make it work,  or find alternative ingredients.  Today, I used leftover hotdogs from lunch at Sam's club yesterday as a pork element in some home made baked beans. I used pinto beans  (which I thought I hated) and they turned out awesome actually.

If you haven't done something  like this, I highly recommend  it. It's given me a lot of perspective on what it must feel like to struggle with food and providing for your family.

Twelve-10 things I love

1. My family
2. Beautiful sunny and warm winter days
3. Wearing my handmade clothing
4. Coffee
5. Dark chocolate
6. Spending 1 on 1 or 2 on 1 time with the kids
7. Shopping!
8. Creating things
9. Feeling appreciated
10. Alone time

Eleven

I have an alarm set on my phone for 8pm  in order to try and remember to write something. Now, I tell the kids that the alarm means it's grownup time. Ha

Ten

My girls have been with my mom all weekend and it feels so strange to have only two. It's nice though to sobs some time just with my little guys.

Nine

Didn't win 900 million and still doing what I'm doing!! My girls are hanging out with grandma this weekend and the house is so quiet with only two kids!!!

Took all of them swimming at grandma's hotel yesterday.  Ollie and Char loved to swim, and Elliott was doing acrobatics trying to look at the turtle on his puddle jumper. Evy swam with mommy!!

Resolutions

You might be wondering  what on earth these short daily posts are about,  so I thought I'd talk about it for a sec. Someone posted this article just before the new year http://thoughtcatalog.com/brianna-wiest/2015/12/16-goals-to-set-for-next-year-that-are-more-about-enjoying-what-you-have-than-chasing-what-you-dont/

It really spoke to me. Each January I always say, "I'm going to lose weight or I'm going to do this and that" but it never happens. So this year I'm just going to focus on what I DO have and how I can enjoy all of that. Simplify things.  Get rid of stuff. Change things that drive me nuts. Take time for myself to do things I like to do. And write more.

At the end of the day I feel like I have a million things rolling around in my head and writing is really like therapy for me. I just quit taking antidepressants  a couple weeks ago after being on them 2+ years and I feel better already. At first they helped,  but lately they seem to be making me crazier. So, here I am. Trying to work on healing myself from the inside and not worrying about all of those resolutions that get given up by Valentines Day.

Eight

Grandma's here to visit!  Yahoo!

Went fabric shopping and out for coffee today with a friend. Feels amazing to get out without kids!

Seven

My boys went to preschool yesterday!  They loved it, and Ollie only hit one kid.

Six

Great day today with minimal yelling  (I know,  I know )

Boys start preschool tomorrow and we're all beyond ready. I never thought I'd send 2 year olds to school, but here we are!

Highlights of the day.... Ollie telling me his nipples  were called beans. And that they're for grown ups

A perfect stranger paying for the boys haircuts!

Going to target ALONE!

Realizing that I will be getting a break for a couple hours a week!  And time just with my girls

(Yesterday) I took Evy to the grocery store alone. It was SO much fun to spend time one on one with her and really listen to what she's saying without distractions.  That girl is ridiculously  smart, observant,  and inquisitive.  Right now she wants to know what melts and why it melts. I tried explaining water molecules moving faster and faster but we may need books for better explanations.  And why people don't melt even though they can freeze.

Five

Just one word for today: Frustrated

Four

What a whirlwind of a day. Business is good, what can I say. Which makes for a lot of running around for ingredients,  etc.

Today I picked up 80 pounds of apples, and 35 pounds of sugar. I ran out of time, so the 48 cartons of blackberries will have to wait!

T minus 2 days until the girls are back in school,  3 days until the boys first day, and 4 days until Grandma gets here!

Three

Yesterday I got some crock pot apple butter started and today when I woke up it smelled like HEAVEN!!! Kids were up around 7, and I had it all jarred up by about 8:30.

The girls and I headed off to a birthday party for the good part of the day after that. They played,  ate pizza, swam, and then we did a little shopping. It was a beautiful day here today. Around 45° and the sun was shining. Perfect winter day here!

Two

January 2nd and things are already breaking left and right. First the ignitor on my stove,  and today the button that closes the door on my van. Sweeeeeet. Not.

Kids didn't nap so everyone was cranky by 7pm but hopefully that means they will fall asleep fast.

Brian is off of work another week or so, so I'm trying to build up my jam inventory while he's home. Today was Cowboy Candy ( Candied Jalapeños ) and now my kitchen is all spicy and sticky. Oh joy. And did I mention  the dishwasher  broke too?

One

Lazy day today. Nothing out of the ordinary. Kids destroyed the house, played on their tablets,  watched Aladdin, and saw Grandma and cousin Lena  over Skype.

I did a little sewing, sold some jam, and learned to use a food dehydrator. Guess we'll see how that turns out

2015

Hard to believe 2015 has come and gone.... and I totally left this blog in the dust.

I really miss writing and perhaps I will start up again... or make a few entries and forget again. Ha.

In short,  things are pretty wild around here. The girls started preschool in the fall and are loving every  minute of it. They are growing and learning SO much! Charlotte has really gotten into painting, arts and crafts,  and is a blossoming leader. Evy loves roll playing in the "red center" (grocery store), and playing with friends. They are both adapting quite well to going to school and being away from mom.

The boys are talking SO much and I can't even believe it.  Sometimes I think they just like the sound of their own voices. Elliott is a tank weighing in at 40 pounds and likes to touch and explore everything.  Ollie's favorite thing is anything that has to do with sticks. If there's a stick, he will find it!!!!  The boys will be starting preschool next week. I found a program for non potty trained 2 year olds and they are ready to cut the cord and spend some time in a structured classroom. They need it and so do I!

Brian is working as an adjunct professor and attempting to finish his dissertation.

As for me, I'm working on expanding my businesses. I now make jam, and sew kids clothes, women's clothes (including the most wonderful undies!) And also do embroidery.  I started selling Scentsy too bevause I'm in love with the products!!!

I hope this finds you well, and that you had a great 2015! Perhaps you will see more of me in this new year.