Thursday, December 22, 2011

We Made It!

Somehow... not sure how.... we made it to Minnesota!  Last night into today it snowed about two feet in the Denver area.  The snow was so deep on my driveway my boots sunk all the way into it and got my pants wet.  I was not too happy about that.  The day started out by needing to take the dog to the kennel to be boarded.  I left the house at about 9:45 and was home by 10:45.  The drive usually takes 20 minutes each way so an hour wasn't bad considering that I wasn't driving very fast to get there.  After the dog was dropped off I had to shovel some of the driveway so that we could get out later.  We had booked a Super Shuttle to pick us up and bring us to the airport so that we didn't have to shove ourselves into my SUV. 

When the driveway was shoveled I went inside and continued to pack, wash clothes, wash bottles, make bottles, etc.  I was struggling to make our 2:00 deadline when the shuttle was to pick us up.  Somehow, the girls were in their carseats and we were all ready to go by about 1:45.  Not sure how that happened, but it did.  Brian and I realized that we hadn't eaten breakfast or lunch yet so we shoved our faces with some Halloween candy.  2:00 came around and we anxiously awaited the shuttle.  We waited.... and waited... and waited.... and then it was 2:30 and the shuttle was still not there. 

I called the company and asked where the hell our van was.  They called dispatch and got the run around.  Apparently they couldn't send out a handicap accessible van as we requested so they called Yellow Cab to send out an accessible vehicle for us.  They sounded shocked that nobody had called us to say that the cab was supposed to be coming instead.  I asked when the cab was going to be there and nobody could tell me.  I was pissed.... actually beyond pissed at this point.  It was now 2:45 and our flight left at 5:40.  We were at least 45 minutes from the airport and had no idea how we were going to get there.  At that point we made an executive decision to get in the car and go.  I shoved our suitcases in (one in between the girls and two in the back) and the stroller and I loaded Brian's wheelchair after he got in the car.  We all fit... but barely. 

We were now on the way to the airport in a hurry.  There is nothing worse than being super mad and having to drive in not the best road conditions.  I shouldn't say the roads were horrible, because they weren't... but they were still slick.  Then, to add insult to injury, my wiper fluid stopped working on the driver's side.  Yup, the passenger side squirter worked fine but not the drivers side.  Awesome. 

We got to the airport and parked in the garage parking.  Did I mention that the shuttle company was going to pay our parking?  They better damn well pay it!  They put us through hell thinking we might miss our flight. 

Getting through security was a breeze.  We went right through and all of the people were super helpful getting the carseats and stroller put back together after I walked through.  We didn't feel rushed or like we were super in the way or anything. 

We got to the gate with about 5 minutes to spare.  We were lucky and got to pre board so that was nice.  BUT, you can't have more than 4 people in a row and we were on a full flight so I had to sit across from Brian.  I sat by a really nice gal that had just got engaged and we pretty much talked the entire flight.  She totally didn't mind sitting by me and Charlotte so that was really nice. 

Both girls did great on the flight!  Charlotte slept most of the time and Evy did some of the time.  Neither of them really cried at all which was nice.  They got bottles going up and down so their ears didn't hurt so that worked out just fine.  Brian's dad picked us up... we went to Walmart to pick up a few things and then checked into our hotel.  That was a nightmare but the story will have to wait for another day.

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Holiday Travel

I am really looking forward to going back to Minnesota for Christmas but sometimes I think we just might be a little nutty for doing so.  I have a list about 50 miles long of things that I need to do/pack before we go tomorrow.  But, every time I look at the list I realize that I have to wait for something in order to pack that item.  I need to pack clothes.... they are in the dryer.  I need to pack my breast pump & accessories.... the bottles are drying.  I need to pack Christmas presents..... Brian ran out to pick them up.  I need to pack the diaper bag for the airplane..... but I can't make bottles until a few minutes before we go.  I feel like I am just going round and round in circles and nothing is getting accomplished. 

The girls have been sleeping for a good part of the day today.  They got so much stimulation when Grandma was here that they are just worn out!  Speaking of which, they had a great five day visit with Grandma!  We mostly just hung out and that was really nice.  We had full intentions of painting my bathroom downstairs and installing the toilet (which we did buy) but it was more important to spend time with the girls.  My mom did get my kitchen organized though!  I started with the pantry last week and that's about as far as I got.  She helped me clear out the junk and organize so that the pots/mixing bowls/small appliances were more accessible and in more logical places.  Its been something that's been bugging me for some time now but was such a huge task I never felt like I had time for it.  My mom was here back in October when the girls were born and they were swimming in their 0-3mo. clothing.  Now they fill out their 0-3mo. clothing and are getting ready to go to the 3-6mo. stuff!

 Its hard to believe how fast they are growing and that they are almost double their birth weights.  It feels like pretty soon I will be 40 and they will be in middle school! Ha!  Its just a reminder to enjoy every moment because they won't be my little babies forever.

Ok, back to the trip..... Tomorrow is going to be absolutely nutty.  Our flight leaves at 5:40 p.m. and we will be leaving for the airport at 2p.m.  We weren't exactly sure how we were going to fit everything into one of our SUVs so we decided to book a SuperShuttle to the airport.  We will pay the same price as we would for parking and this way someone will pick us up and help load/unload all of the suitcases.  Hopefully they will even help us get everything to the check-in counter because I'm not sure how we are going to manage two babies, three suitcases, a diaper bag, etc. but I'm sure we will figure it out.  We always do.  The only thing that I am actually worried about at this point is the weather.  We are supposed to get a bunch of snow tonight into tomorrow and it sounds like its going to be a mess.  Some airlines have already said that they are waiving the fees for changing flights so that's not a good sign.  I really hope our flight isn't delayed or cancelled.  That would be a nightmare! 

Saturday, December 17, 2011


I have been terrified of going up to school to show off the babies because I didn't want them to get sick. I knew that everybody has been wanting to see them and my boss just happened to call and ask if I would come up for an informal meeting.  Since she called, I felt obligated to go.... but I was very careful.  I didn't let the students touch the kiddos and I had everybody that wanted to hold them wash their hands or use hand sanitizer.  I, however, was not careful with myself I guess.  A few days ago it started with a sore throat.  I felt pretty good with the exception of that.  Then my nose started running and and I was really tired.  I guess if I was going to get sick now is better than when I go back to work in a couple of weeks. 

Other than that, this week has been filled with holiday parties!  Since I work at two schools, I got to go to both parties.  Thursday was fun.... we all went to a Mexican restaurant that one of my student's parents run.  The food was sooo good!  I brought the girls along and they were the life of the party!  They got passed around all night and really enjoyed snuggling with all of my coworkers.  The party was only supposed to go from 4-6 but I didn't end up leaving until almost 8:00.  It was really nice to catch up and have some adult conversations!

I fed the girls around 7:30 and they fell asleep on the car trip home.  I took them inside and left them in their carseats expecting them to wake up around 10:30 to eat again.  Much to my surprise, they didn't wake up until 4:30a.m.!  I got horrible sleep that night since I kept waking up every couple hours to see if they were okay since they were sleeping in their carseats.  It was nice they both slept at the same time but it was too bad that I couldn't take advantage of it. 

My mom was coming to visit from Minnesota and her flight came in at around 8:30.   I fell back asleep from 6:30-7:00 but almost felt worse for taking such a short nap. After I picked my mom up, we pretty much just hung out all day.  I must say it was really nice to have some extra help with the babies.  We had another holiday party to go to that night.  Brian couldn't go since the place wasn't handicap accessible so my mom went with me.  The dinner was pretty expensive so that was pretty disappointing but the company was good so I guess that's all that matters.  When we got home we fed the girls and went to bed... or tried I should say.  Charlotte usually goes to bed pretty well (but not as well as Evy) but last night she was just not having it.  The only way she would sleep was if it was in my arms.  I put her down unsuccessfully a couple times and finally got her to sleep around 2a.m. after she ate again and at that point I had pretty much been awake for 24 hours.  I got up at 7:30 or so, fed the girls, and then took a nap until almost noon.  My mom was watching the babies and I think I slept extra hard since I wasn't listening for crying or baby noises. 

What a day!  It felt like the longest day ever but it was a good one =)

Sunday, December 11, 2011


The picture of the girls with Santa came by e-mail today!  They look so adorable. 

Evelyn (left) Santa (middle) Charlotte (right)

Saturday, December 10, 2011

First Family Photo

Today we went to a Santa Breakfast put on by the MOMs (Mother of Multiples) club in my area.  There was a breakfast at a hotel and a photo opportunity with Santa!  It was so crazy to see all of the other people with twins.  I always wonder really how many of them are fertility twins and how many are spontaneous.  As a side note: I bought the bumbo seats from a MOM and she said that she used my same fertility doc and knew of other women with multiples that used our same fertility doc too!  I knew he was good but didn't know that I would actually meet people who had gone to him too! 

Anyways, it was super nice to not have to go to the mall and be rushed and maybe get a good pic and maybe not.  The photographer took several pictures for us and is going to e-mail us one of the pictures!  I'm glad that we will have a digital copy.  I'm sure the picture will be funny.  Charlotte was fixated on the ceiling fan so she was looking up the whole time.  It doesn't matter though.  I'm sure it will still be adorable.    After we were done with breakfast I decided that we needed a family photo.  I'm pretty certain that this is the first one.  If there's another one out there, it wasn't taken with my camera.

Brian is holding Evy and I am holding Charlotte

I set Evy down while I was getting her sister ready to go and I found her trying to break out!

My mom is making the girls Christmas outfits so they wore these cute sleepers for their picture with Santa. Evy is on top and Char is on the bottom.

We went out to dinner last night and they were so cute sleeping in their stroller. Charlotte is in the front and Evy is in the back.

Thursday, December 8, 2011

Two Month Checkup

Yesterday Brian and I took the girls to the doctor for their two month checkup!  I was very interested to see how much weight they gained and if they had caught up in their percentiles at all for height, weight and head size.  We got to the doctor's office right on time!  They actually called us back on time too!  Usually when you have appointments in the afternoon it seems like they run behind schedule and you end up waiting.  The nurse first checked the girls height, weight and head size.  I always get worried that they are going to have an accident on the scale since they have to be completely naked!  Here's how they measured up:

Evelyn: Birth weight: 7lbs 0oz
December 7th:
Height: 22inches 30th percentile
Weight: 11lbs 9oz 70th percentile
Head: 40.3cm 80-85th percentile

Charlotte: Birth weight 6lbs 3oz
December 7th:
Height: 21 3/4 inches 20th percentile
Weight: 10lbs 12.4oz 50th percentile
Head: 39.3cm 65th percentile

It looks like I still have two shorties with big heads! LOL  Their daddy has a big head and I am pretty short so I guess they are taking after us equally. 

After the nurse got done checking their stats, we went back to the room to wait for the doctor.  Our pediatrician is actually out on maternity leave so we saw a physician's assistant today.  She was nice but I didn't like her as much as I like our regular doc.  She checked Charlotte first.... looked in her eyes, pressed on her tummy and opened up her diaper and looked at her hips.  Well, its a VERY good thing that she checked Charlotte first.  About the time she was checking Charlotte's diaper Evelyn had a HUGE rumbling in her pants.  I opened up her diaper to change her and it was seriously liquid poop.  I'm not sure if she peed at the same time or what but it was soooo gross! I tried to change her as cleanly as possible but it got everywhere! How embarrassing.  I looked like I didn't know how to change a diaper.

The doc checked Evy out and asked us about the girls' development.  Right now they should be smiling in response to our voices, holding their heads up to at least at 45 degree angle, bearing weight on their legs if we hold them up and following people across a room.  They are doing all of those things so I am very happy that they are on track!  She said that very soon they would start giggling.  I can't wait. 

The last part of the appointment was the "fun" part.  The girls had to get three shots and a vaccination that they had to drink.  They were the bravest babies I have ever seen!  Charlotte didn't even cry until the second needle went into her leg.  Evy cried a little more but she did great as well.  They each cried for five minutes- if that and were sound asleep as soon as we got in the car.  They even slept the whole time while Brian and I went grocery shopping. 

We got home and it was a totally different story. They were both crying so I had to feed them at the same time.  I never do it, but I left them in their carseats and propped up their bottles.  I have only done this once before and felt super horrible about not holding them while I fed them.  But, they needed food and they needed it fast.  Later that evening Evelyn would just not stop crying.  She wasn't happy in her swing or laying down in her bassinet.  All she wanted was for mommy to hold her.  She isn't usually as snuggly as her sister so it was really nice to be able to hold her and cuddle with her for a couple of hours.  It really made me feel like she actually needed me.  She just slept on my chest while I watched a little TV and dozed off for a while. 

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Two Months Old and a New Do!

The girls are two months old today!!!  The time has gone by so fast.  Today I told Brian that they would be in college before we know it haha.   Brian and I will take them to the doctor tomorrow and I am really interested to see how much they weigh and how long they are!  It still feels like there is at least a pound difference between Charlotte and Evelyn and I guess we will find that out tomorrow!  They are both wearing size 1 diapers and quickly outgrowing their 0-3 and 3 month clothes.  Charlotte can still fit into a few of her newborn jammies but Evelyn can't because they are too short for her now and she can't stretch her legs out if she wears them. 

Last night Evelyn slept another 10 hours and Charlotte slept six!  It really does seem early for them to be sleeping through the night but I am not going to complain.  I am going to ask the doctor tomorrow if I should wake Evy to eat but I am really hoping not.  I fed Evy around 7pm yesterday and put her in her swing after watching her smile at me for a while.  I got both girls' bottles ready in preparation for their 10 ish feeding.  I wanted to be ready so that I could pump around 9:30 feed both girls and go to bed without wasting too much precious sleep time.  Charlotte woke up so I fed her first.  I turned on the TV and waited for Evy to wake up and eat.  But..... she just kept on sleeping!  Isn't that the first rule of parenthood that you should never wake a sleeping baby? If not, it should be.  I didn't want to waste anymore time so I dozed off on the couch.  I figured she would wake up at some point and I would just feed her and go to bed.  Well, 5am came and she was still sleeping!  I fed Charlotte and then woke up Evy to eat.  I didn't think that I could let her go more than 10 hours.  I tried to feed her but she only at 3oz, threw up and went back to sleep.  I guess at this point I just need to roll with it!  I'm not sure what else I can do. 

I remembered to take their picture with the bear today!

Evy (left) and Charlotte (right) sitting with the bear

Evy (left) and Charlotte (right)- 2 Months OLD!! WOW!

After a lot of debate, I decided to cut my hair!! In all, I think I cut about 18 inches off.  I went to the salon only intending to cut about 6 inches but when I showed the stylist a picture of this type of short cut that I was thinking about she's like DO IT!  So, I did!  Brian asked me if I was going to be emotional about cutting it and I said Yeah, probably but so far I am okay with it.  It was only cut about 3 hours ago but I really think that I like it short.  It will be much easier and it actually has a style!  If you missed what it looked like before, just click on either of my last two posts and you can see how crazy long it was.

Monday, December 5, 2011

No Formula Today!

I am happy to say that neither of the girls have eaten one drop of formula today!!!  Last night Evy slept from 10pm-7am!  Charlotte slept from 10pm-4am and then 4am-7:30ish.  They are finally starting to sleep through the night and it feels amazing to get a solid 6 hours of sleep at night if I go to bed when they do.  I got up today at 7ish, fed Evy, pumped and then fed Charlotte.  I woke up before they even did because one of my boobs was leaking.  Many would find this annoying but I find it to be a good sign that I have lots of milk!  I pumped 11oz after sleeping! YAY! That was the most I've had so far in one session.  They are currently drinking 4-5oz so that made 2 full bottles plus a little extra.  I was pumped (haha) to say the least.  Its now 7:30pm and we just fed them again a few minutes ago and I have 2 oz of breastmilk left in the refrigerator for later.  Obviously 2oz is not going to be enough to feed them when they eat in a couple hours so we will have to give them formula.  BUT, they sleep way longer when they have formula so I am okay with them having it at night.  I feel really good that I was able to provide enough boob juice for them all day today! Hooray!  Lets see how tomorrow goes.

I have been taking note on which diapers are the best and if it is really worth buying the name brand diapers instead of the cheaper store brand ones.  The answer is YES.  The cheap diapers really are cheap and I think I will end up spending more on new clothes and Oxy Clean when they leak all out of their diaper.  This is the ranking that I have come up with so far for diapers and wipes:

1. Pampers
2. Huggies (close second)
3. Luvs
4. Babies R Us brand
5. Target Brand
I still have a package of the Walmart brand that I haven't used yet so I will keep you posted

1. Huggies (They smell REALLY good!)
2. Pampers
3. Walmart Brand (Parent's Choice I think they are called)
4. Target brand (These are soooo thin and dry out really fast if you forget to close the lid to the dispenser.  They also don't dispense properly from the pampers dispenser that I have and therefore I waste a lot)

Moral of the story: Don't waste money on the cheap stuff! I plan to continue to use coupons which makes things slightly more reasonable.  We go through about 20 diapers per day so I have to watch the price on the diapers!

Yesterday I bought the girls Bumbo seats from another MOM (Mother of Multiples).  They retail for $40 each and I got them for $10 each!  The lady I got them from bought them from another MOM and I plan to sell them to another MOM when I am done with them!  Its really great to buy things used when you can.  I can't believe how big the girls are getting already!  My mom asked, "Where did my little burritos go that I left in October?"  We called them burritos when they were all wrapped up in their swaddles.  She lives in Minnesota and only gets to see them via pictures or Skype and I must say they are growing like weeds!  They can both hold their heads up pretty well and are on their way to rolling over.  When I put them on their tummies they do a lot of kicking and grunting so it seems they are moving in the right direction. 

Ok, now for a few photos from the last week or so!

I went to take Charlotte out of the car and found her with her hat in her hand!

Evy and her cute smushy face

Charlotte- We went out to dinner and I thought I should put her snowsuit on since it was cold outside.  But, it was way to poofy to fit in her carseat with it actually buckled.

Charlotte (left) and Evy (right)- I call this "Virtual Babysitting"  I was skyping with my mom yesterday and set the babies down so she could see them without me holding them.  I then told her that I was going to go to the movies and asked if she could babysit.  LOL.  I wish it worked that way,

Evy (left) and Charlotte (right) with me in the middle.  I am in my pajamas without any makeup on but who cares.  I just want to make sure that I have pictures with the girls when they are little.  I want them to see that yes, I was young once.  =)

Evy (left) and Charlotte (right) in their Bumbo seats

Evy (left) and Charlotte (right) playing footsie in their Bumbo seats

Sunday, December 4, 2011

From 2000 to 2011

I can't believe that Brian and I have been together for 11 years!!!  We started dating at the end of our Junior year in high school and are still going strong here 11 years later.  I was thinking back to the days when we met and what things were like and I thought it would be fun to show some pictures of us throughout the years!  I am also thinking of chopping all my hair off and was looking to see if I had any hairstyles that looked good and maybe I could go back to.  Here are a few pictures of us through the years!  Enjoy!

2001- At a park by White Bear Lake

2001- Homecoming Dance at my high school

2001 Senior Prom for my high school (I am in the purple dress)

2001- MORP dance at Brian's high school (we are on the left)

July 2005- Our Wedding!



2007 New Years Eve




2007- Brian "marriaged" a couple and they had a Renaissance theme

September 2007- Brian's 25th Birthday in Mankato

2007- All dressed up for a wedding!

2008- A night out on the town with friends in Mankato


2009- Valentine's Day!

Today! December 4th, 2011

Friday, December 2, 2011


Sometimes I cry when I look my girls in the eye because I love them oh so much!  I can't imagine my life any other way.

Charlotte's foot on the left and Evy's on the right

Middle of the Night

Lately the girls have been going to bed around eight or nine at night.  Tonight was no different.  Charlotte woke up at about 2:30 to eat tonight.  I took her out of her bassinet and fed her right away.  When she was done eating I took her into her room and attempted to change her diaper.  OK.. back up one second.... I have heard that at night you are supposed to not talk to the babies, keep the room dark, etc. etc. So, I only turn the hall light on outside their room so that I can change them with a little bit of light but not a ton.  I put Charlotte onto her changing pad, unbutton her sleeper and take off her diaper.  I reach for a new diaper and have it about halfway on when I notice that she is peeing on my hand as I am putting on her diaper!! Geez girl!  So I not only got peed on but also wasted a perfectly good diaper that was now wet on all sides.  Her sleeper and swaddling blanket are also wet and must be changed before going back to sleep.  These girls just crack me up!  Its also funny that pretty much the same thing happened with Evelyn earlier as well.  However, I wasn't lucky enough to have my hand in the way for her.... she peed on the changing pad while I turned my head to reach for a new diaper.  That will show me!  Just when I thought I was petty quick about changing the diaper.... I guess I will just have to be a little faster next time! =D

Thursday, December 1, 2011

Child Care

Brian teaches adjunct at a college here in town and recently just applied to a couple of other schools to see if he could pick up a few additional classes.  Well, he was successful and will now be teaching at two different colleges!  Its great for him to get his foot in the door while he is still working on his PhD so that maybe he can become a full professor somewhere when he is done with school.  While teaching more = more money and more experience it also means more challenges. 

His teaching schedule hasn't been an issue while I was on leave since I could obviously just stay home and take care of the babies.  But, as his teaching schedule changes for January that means we will actually have to find someone to watch the kiddos while we are both working.  We were hoping that he could teach only night classes but its looking like that isn't going to happen. Brian was recently offered one class at this new school on Mondays and Wednesdays in the morning.  The other school is giving him 1-3 classes depending on which ones fill up and one of those would be on Tuesdays during the daytime.  He only needs to be gone about 2 1/2-3 hours for each class but they are all spread out and at odd times of the day.  I mean who wants to come over and babysit at 6:30am?  We figured out that we would be spending half the money he makes teaching on hiring somebody to watch the girls.  Is that worth it?  Yes and no.  It gets his foot in the door for teaching more classes (which could be at night) but it also means that someone other than Brian and I taking care of the girls. 

I would say I am a pretty trusting person, but not when it comes to my precious babies.  I guard them like a hawk!  We don't let any sick people come over and I try not to even see anybody who knows anybody who MIGHT be sick LOL.  We make all people wash their hands before handling the babies and don't let anybody hold the babies that smokes unless they haven't smoked in the clothes they are wearing.  They are my pride and joy and I don't want them to get sick. 

So how the heck are we supposed to hire somebody that we don't even really know to watch them? I am not really comfortable with that thought at all.  There are a couple of people that we know that  may want the job so I guess we will just have to wait and see.  Even if one of the people we know watched them one day and one of our other friends watched them the other days that would be fine.  We really want someone to come to the house instead of having to take the babies somewhere.  I am hoping that whoever we hire can do a load of laundry and maybe some dishes while they are sleeping too.  Wouldn't that be nice!  My other reason for wanting to get someone to come to the house is for the fact that it would be difficult for Brian to load and unload the girls himself.  It would probably be easier to find somewhere for us to just drop the girls off for a few hours and then pick them up.  BUT, I would drop them off and then Brian would have to pick them up.  While they are still little and not able to walk themselves to the car I think it would be hard for Brian to get them in and out by himself.  He is a very creative thinker and could probably figure it out but it would be easier to not have to.  Those daycare places too probably have sick kids and tons of germy fingers everywhere.  It gives me the shivers just thinking about all of the germs.  Yuck. 

If anybody out there has any suggestions on how to get over letting a stranger into the house or how to even find someone, I am open for suggestions. =)

Sunday, November 27, 2011

You know you're a.....

twin mama after infertility when:

You cook Thanksgiving dinner
Sleep from 6-11pm
Get up around 8 on Black Friday
Go to Kohl's
Go to Olive Garden
Go to Target
Feed & change babies at Target
Go home
Drink a Red Bull
Spend 2 hours cleaning
Feed Babies
Make dinner
Finally crash after babies are sleeping

And are a happy person at the end of the day =)

Friday, November 25, 2011

Unsuccessful Success

Brian was sleeping and I decided to try and tandem breastfeed.  It was good at first because both girls latched and fed for a good 20 minutes or so.  Fast forward 5 minutes.  I put both girls in their swings and they were happy for like 5 minutes.. then WAAAAAAAA. They were both still hungry and not happy.  Grrrr. Now to try and feed them with bottles at the same time.

Thanksgiving (a day late)

This Thanksgiving Brian and I spent the holiday with our new family!  Sometimes we have friends over for dinner but not this year.  We made a huge dinner like usual and it was super yummy!  But, when we got done we were both so incredibly tired that it was just ridiculous.  In fact, I was so tired that Brian let me sleep for a solid 5 hours!  What an amazing husband. 

I have so much to be thankful for this year!  I am so lucky that I got to spend Thanksgiving with my two beautiful daughters.  They only had milk for dinner but its all the same to them.  I am also thankful for my wonderful husband Brian.  He is the best daddy ever!  He takes nighttime feedings so that I can get some sleep and takes care of the girls while I go out and spend time with my friends occasionally.  He is so funny with the girls and is trying to teach them the little bit of Spanish that he does know.  I am fluent, but he's the one saying funny phrases to them.  Its very cute. 

I am also thankful for all of our friends and family that have supported us throughout our struggle with infertility and with the twin pregnancy.  I am amazed that five baby showers were thrown for us!  We could have never afforded all of the wonderful things we have for the girls and we are just so lucky to have so many people that care about us and the girls. 

Last, I am thankful for the health and good fortune of our family.  I am lucky enough to have a job and Brian is picking up more classes this spring at another college to help make ends meet.  Depending on his schedule we will probably have to hire someone to watch the girls for a few hours per week but that will probably be good for his sanity. 

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Feeling Refreshed!

About a year and a half ago one of my good friends moved to Texas.  We worked together for two years and became great friends.  Even though she is a few hundred miles away, she always comes back to Colorado for Thanksgiving and Christmas to see her family and friends.  She called me yesterday and we made plans for today since she would only be in town for a few days.   The first thing I said to her was something like, "I NEED MARGARITAS." LOL  It seems like we are always finding some shenanigans to get ourselves into and today was no different. 

She came to the house first and checked out the babies.  After hanging out for a bit, we went out for some Mexican food and boy was it yummy!  I ordered the "Cadillac" Margarita and she got a blended raspberry one.  It was seriously the best tasting margarita I think I've ever had!  I also had some super yummy fajitas with guac and sour cream.  Yummmmm.  We left the restaurant and went to the mall for a bit.

The first store we went into was The Gap.  I was trying on some pants when Eleanor found some very furry looking accessories and just had to try them on. 

Now those are some "boots with the fur" LOL

After we went to The Gap, we went to American Eagle.  We made a few jokes about how we were old enough to be the kids that were shopping at the stores teachers.  We are almost 30 and still shop there, but that's okay, right?  Once again they had some amazingly tacky furry accessories and we couldn't help but to try them on and giggle like teenagers.

This is how people from Texas dress when its "freezing" at 60 degrees in Colorado haha

After making complete fools of ourselves, we went to Payless and bought some flip flops so that we could go get pedicures and not have to put our boots back on and get the polish all messed up.  I got a sparkly pink color with a pretty flower!

Pretty Toes!

It was so great to get out of the house for a couple hours and goof around at the mall.  There has to be a balance in life and I balance staying at home with going to the mall and acting silly with friends!  When I got home the girls were starting to wake up so I fed them and let daddy go lay down and relax for a bit.  I actually feel more rested than I have in days and I really didn't sleep any more than usual.  I guess it was just really nice to see a friend and have some good 'ol girl time.

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

One Year Blogaversary

One year ago (yesterday) I started blogging!  What a year its been I must say.  I started this blog as a way to vent my feelings and not take them out on other people.  I miscarried early November and felt so alone and like no one understood what I was going through.  I was at the lowest of lows in my life and didn't know how I was going to dig my way out.  The only way I knew how to deal with things was to keep going with the fertility treatments.  I thought that if I kept pursuing my goal of becoming a mother then the pain would go away. 

Don't get me wrong, I still think about that baby that could have been. But had that soul not been lost, I would have never met my beautiful Charlotte and Evelyn that I am so lucky to have. 

Becoming part of the bloggie community has taught me a lot about patience and perseverance. I have connected with others that are in the same situation with regards to infertility.  Some women have had success since I started reading their blogs and some still have yet to see a positive HPT.  In fact, one of the gals that I follow just today saw her first positive test after 3 years of TTC!!  Congrats girl!  I am so happy for her.  Anyways, I have to say that I am one of the fortunate ones that have beaten infertility and have a success story to tell.  This blog has served as a diary of my journey and something that I will share with the girls when they are older.  I hope they will know how much they are loved and wanted and if they ever question it I suppose I have these memories to show them just how special they are and how many people supported us on the journey to conceive them. 

I plan to continue blogging but I suppose I have made the shift now to talking about parenthood.  Being a twin mom, I know I have more challenges than others may have but I also have a different perspective on motherhood as well. 

Friday, November 18, 2011

Newborn Pictures!

One of the services that the hospital offers is taking newborn photos while you are still at the hospital.  Someone comes right to the room and snaps the photos and then you have the option to buy them later if you want.  Well, who can say no to already taken newborn photos?  Not Me!  The prints were crazy expensive so we just bought the CD for a reasonable price.  Here are a few of them! 


Evy & Char





Char & Evy

Char & Evy

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

6 Week OB Appointment

Today I went back to the  OBGYN for my 6 week post c-section appointment.  I didn't really know what the appointment was for.... I figured they would just check my scar, ask a few questions and send me on my way.  Nope!  Instead, the nurse asks me to undress.... all the way!  Huh? I was not expecting that at all and hadn't even shaved my legs.  Whoops. Little did I know that they would be doing an annual exam and a breast exam.  It was no big deal, but it would have been nice to know what to expect. 

I told the doc about my milk issue and he gave me a prescription for Reglan.  He said in a lot of patients that he has it has increased the supply so much that no formula supplementation is necessary... even with twins!  I am hoping this is the case because the formula is so crazy expensive! 

The doc also asked why exactly we had to do IVF and what our plan for birth control was.  I almost actually started laughing.  I was just thinking to myself... birth control?? Why would I need that??? He just said that after pregnancy often a woman doesn't know when she ovulates before her first period.  But, I don't really ovulate either so... yeah..... don't think that will be a problem.  I guess being an infertile will save me a few bucks by not using birth control. ha. 

I had to go to this appointment without Brian and with the babies today.  I took my dad to the airport and went straight to my appointment.  I was about 45 minutes early but didn't really have time to go home, feed the babies, then get everyone packed up in the car and go to the appointment.  When I got there, the babies were sound asleep!  I though... hmmm... do I wake them to change/feed them? Or, do I wait and hope they don't wake up during the appointment.  I decided to wake them up.  I got Evelyn changed & fed and Char changed before they called me back. But of course they were not happy campers being awake and in their carseats.  The nurses were super nice and took them and held them while I was talking with the doctor.  I felt bad at first that they had to watch them, but they said that they actually look forward to people bringing their babies back and getting to hold them for a little while.  I must say, it was nice that they were so accommodating. 

I also asked the doc when it was safe to try for more babies.  He said to wait at least six months.  I don't know why anyone would really want to try sooner than that anyways... that would be a little nutty.  It actually scares the crap out of me to think about going down the road of fertility treatments again....... the emotional rollercoaster of that is just not something a person can really look forward to.  But, I wonder if it will be so stressful after already having a successful pregnancy.  Who knows.  All I really know is that we still have 7 frozen embryos to think about.  That is for later though.  Right now I have two beautiful girls that I can't take my mind off of.  Every time I look at them I just think about how much I love them and how lucky I am to be their mommy.

Evy (left) was making some grunting noises and some rumblings in her pants were happening.  Char (right) was looking at her saying, "Whats that smell? Do you have poopy in your pants?" 

Saturday, November 12, 2011

Sleep = Awesome

Its amazing how clearly I can think today!  I actually feel well rested and like a normal person.  The girls slept last night from about 11-3 were awake long enough for me to feed them and then from 3-7!  They typically fuss, cry, etc. for a little while after they are done eating but last night they were perfect little angels and seriously read my mind.... mommy needed sleep! To make last night even better, Brian got up for their morning feeding and so all I had to do was pump and I went back to bed for about three more hours.  Even though it was broken up, approx. 9 hours of sleep felt like a million years!!

After I got up at about 11am, Brian had to get working on his homework.  His paper isn't technically due until Tuesday, but my dad is coming to visit from Minnesota Sunday-Tuesday so Brian doesn't want to be working on homework the whole time he is here.  My dad is the last of the grandparents to come visit and I think its wonderful that all four of them have been able to make the trip out here to Colorado.  We are going to Minnesota for Christmas so the girls can meet their great-grandparents (three out of four live in MN) but they have changed so much already in the first five weeks of life that I would hate for their grandparents to miss out on that.  When we go home for Christmas they will be almost three months old!  I actually can't believe how fast its going and soon I will be back at work.  Boo. 

I really do miss being at work, interacting with people, and having real things to accomplish every day but I think its going to be very difficult to leave the girls as well.  On the positive side, at least the girls will not be going to daycare.  Brian is fortunate enough to have a schedule that permits him to stay home most of the time.  He teaches as an adjunct professor at a college nearby and they are going to tentatively give him classes all on one day.  But, that also means that he would be gone from about 10am-10pm in which case we would have to hire someone to watch the girls from 10-6 or whenever I got home from work.  And Yes, I know that I'm a little crazy for thinking about two months from now but I tend to over analyze things and plan everything too much.  I'm not really sure why I do that since nothing ever works out as planned but oh well!

This post is getting super random but that's okay. 

I joined a "Mothers of Multiples" group back in August when they had the multiples sale.  The group has meetings, events, etc.  One of the events they are holding is a breakfast with Santa!  I haven't been to any events yet and thought this one sounded like fun!  The girls will obviously not remember Santa or their first Christmas but I thought it would be good to get their picture taken.  The mall Santa is probably not the place to be.... especially because of all the potentially germy and sick kids so a small gathering is right up my alley!

Daddy and Evy

Thursday, November 10, 2011

Stupid Hormones

I thought that the crazy hormones would decrease after the girls were born but I guess I was wrong.  Today one of my friends posted a picture on facebook of 1000+ ounces of breastmilk all packaged up from the past two months or so.  I'm not really sure what she was doing with the milk or why it wasn't in the freezer and why she was taking a picture but that part doesn't really matter.  I was a little surprised about my reaction to her picture.  I honestly felt super jealous and a little bit upset with my body. 

Currently I am still breastfeeding and supplementing the twins.  Char nurses a lot during the day and gets formula at night (so that Brian can feed her and I can sleep!) and Evelyn gets mostly formula with 2-4 bottles of breastmilk mixed in throughout the day.  Basically, I have barely enough milk to provide for one baby and not a drop more.  I feel very guilty that I am forced to give them yucky formula and that my body can't provide for my babies.  I know it sounds pretty stupid that I am so upset about this, but I just wish my body would do something right for once.  Its not uncommon for someone to have a low milk supply, especially for twins, but I also know that breastmilk works on supply and demand.  If the demand is there the supply should just up itself.  So I just keep asking myself, am I pumping enough? Am I nursing enough? Should I wake up more often during the night and pump more?  Am I eating enough calories and drinking enough water?  The answer to all of these questions is probably not.... 

I just want what's best for the girls and I don't want to regret not doing all that I can for them.  I just wish the stupid PCOS didn't affect my hormones and milk production so that this wasn't an issue.  Brian just thinks I am crazy and that I just shouldn't worry about it, but he just doesn't get it.  He's not the one that feels like a failure.

On a totally different note, my friend Michelle came to visit us from Minnesota for the past five days.  It was super nice having someone else around to help change diapers & hold crying babies.  It was also great to catch up and have lots of girl talk.  I feel like I don't get much of that anymore since I'm not working and pretty much spend all of my time at home or with Brian and the girls.  We even got out of the house and took the babies shopping!  It seems that the only place I take them is to the mall or the grocery store so they will probably turn out to be big shoppers just like their mommy. 

Michelle also offered to babysit the girls while she was here so that Brian and I could go out for a date!  I even bought a new dress!  It was so fun to actually be able to shop at a non maternity store again.

Date Night!

Evy and Char in their jammies