I just wanted to say thank you for all of you out there in bloggie world that read and follow my blog! It has been very therapeutic for me to write down my struggles with infertility and read other blogs of the same content. It makes me feel like I am not the only one that has been through all of this (which I now know that I'm not!)
If you just started reading recently, here is a quick summary of my IF journey! =)
Brian and I got married in July of 2005. He is in a wheelchair and I have PCOS, hypothyroid and MTHFR. We knew that we would have trouble conceiving, but didn't really know what we were in for! In July of 2009 we started seeing a reproductive endocrinologist and did 3 unsuccessful IUIs between Sept. 2009 and December 2009.
After having no success with that, the RE suggested that we move on to IVF. We paid everything out of pocket and IUIs were not that cheap so we went for IVF in March of 2010. The retrieval was very successful! I had approx. 23 eggs and of that 7 made it to 5 day blastocysts. I developed OHSS so we had to do a freeze all. In June we transferred 2 blasts which resulted in a chemical pregnancy and in October we thawed the rest (only 2 survived) and transferred those resulting in a blighted ovum. After the miscarriage we were totally devastated and didn't really know how we were going to get past it. The only thing I thought would help was to try again.
We cycled again in January with an even better round of IVF which we ended up with 9 blastocysts- 2 of which were transferred and are now the baby girls growing in my belly! Brian and I are so lucky that our second cycle of IVF was successful. Honestly, I don't know how much more heartbreak we could have gone through as we were both emotionally and physically drained from the crazy roller coaster of infertility.
I am guessing that if you read my blog you are either going through IF treatments or are now hopefully having a successful pregnancy. (Or, you are someone in my family!) If you haven't commented before (or even if you have!) What is your story?? Leave me a comment with your blog address and I will be sure to check it out! =)
Sunday, August 28, 2011
Saturday, August 27, 2011
Four Weeks
I have only four weeks of work left until I go on maternity leave!!!! At times this pregnancy has gone by slow.... but mostly when I was waiting to see my baby bump. Ever since then it has flown by! It feels like just yesterday that I was going "Geez, I really need to get some new clothes!!" And that was back in May just before school let out for the year.
It was so nice to spend all summer at home relaxing and taking it easy. I could nap whenever I was tired, go to the pool, visit family in Minnesota and get the nursery ready. Now, I go to work, come home, eat dinner and fall asleep shortly after. I seem to have a hard time keeping my eyes open past 7pm these days. But I must admit, it sure is making the time go by fast.
Our weekends are really filling up this month too! This weekend Brian and I going to hang out and spend some time together. He just got a new camera so maybe we drive around and find pretty things to take pictures of. Next weekend our friend Jeni and her husband Brian are driving out here to Colorado from Iowa! They just planned this trip and it couldn't have been better timing. It will be really nice to spend some time with friends before the babies come. The weekend after that we have a breastfeeding class to go to and the weekend after that Brian is going back to Minnesota for his best friend Dave's wedding and his little brother's wedding. That takes us to the weekend of Sept. 24th and that is the start of my maternity leave!!
I am so ready to see these babies that I have been growing for 32 weeks. Brian is so cute... he saw a friend of his yesterday who has a newborn and I think that just makes him want to see the girls even more. I know he's going to be a great daddy. He is one of the most patient and selfless people that I know. He will go out of his way to do nice things for me and for other people. He remembers everything and surprises me with cute stuff all the time... although how small it might be. He came home from the grocery store the other day with Celestial Seasonings Herbal Peach tea. I asked him how he knew that I really liked this tea (because I had only had it at work) and he said that he remembered me mentioning it one time. He's so thoughtful!
Sorry about the ramblings, just a lot on my mind I guess! =)
It was so nice to spend all summer at home relaxing and taking it easy. I could nap whenever I was tired, go to the pool, visit family in Minnesota and get the nursery ready. Now, I go to work, come home, eat dinner and fall asleep shortly after. I seem to have a hard time keeping my eyes open past 7pm these days. But I must admit, it sure is making the time go by fast.
Our weekends are really filling up this month too! This weekend Brian and I going to hang out and spend some time together. He just got a new camera so maybe we drive around and find pretty things to take pictures of. Next weekend our friend Jeni and her husband Brian are driving out here to Colorado from Iowa! They just planned this trip and it couldn't have been better timing. It will be really nice to spend some time with friends before the babies come. The weekend after that we have a breastfeeding class to go to and the weekend after that Brian is going back to Minnesota for his best friend Dave's wedding and his little brother's wedding. That takes us to the weekend of Sept. 24th and that is the start of my maternity leave!!
I am so ready to see these babies that I have been growing for 32 weeks. Brian is so cute... he saw a friend of his yesterday who has a newborn and I think that just makes him want to see the girls even more. I know he's going to be a great daddy. He is one of the most patient and selfless people that I know. He will go out of his way to do nice things for me and for other people. He remembers everything and surprises me with cute stuff all the time... although how small it might be. He came home from the grocery store the other day with Celestial Seasonings Herbal Peach tea. I asked him how he knew that I really liked this tea (because I had only had it at work) and he said that he remembered me mentioning it one time. He's so thoughtful!
Sorry about the ramblings, just a lot on my mind I guess! =)
Thursday, August 25, 2011
Rough Night
Yesterday started out as a pretty normal day... I went to work... got my oil changed and went home. I was super tired and Brian was doing some stuff for work so I decided to pick up Chipotle for dinner. When I got home Brian and I ate dinner and things were fine.
Since I was so tired I ended up falling asleep at 6:30 until about 10:30. When I woke up from my "nap" I had to let the dog out, take my evening meds, etc. I tried to get back to sleep but just couldn't. I was super thirsty, my stomach hurt and I just kept tossing and turning. I eventually took some tums to see if that would help- it didn't.
Brian was out with his friends so I called him and asked him to come home because I didn't feel very good. Its not like he could really do anything for me but I just knew that I would feel better having him at home.
Brian got home around midnight. I heard the garage door open and went outside to see him. He had stopped at the store and got me some Sprite, Gatorade and PB crackers to help my upset stomach. Literally as soon as I saw the food I became extremely nauseated and ran into the bathroom.
Lets just say it was not a pretty sight and my Chipotle came out looking kinda like it did when it went in. I know that throwing up is not like the craziest thing during pregnancy, but I hadn't thrown up before this at all while pregnant. At that point I wasn't sure if I should go to the ER or just ride it out... So I made Brian call the doc and ask him what to do. The on call doc wasn't one that I had seen before, but she said that I probably just ate something weird (the Chipotle) and that if I didn't feel better in the morning then I should go in and get checked out.
Luckily I felt just fine after I vomited. I was hungry, but my stomach didn't hurt anymore. I don't think it helped that my classroom has been about 85 degrees and I feel kinda icky all day. But anyways, not fun night and I have to be at work until 8pm tonight.
Since I was so tired I ended up falling asleep at 6:30 until about 10:30. When I woke up from my "nap" I had to let the dog out, take my evening meds, etc. I tried to get back to sleep but just couldn't. I was super thirsty, my stomach hurt and I just kept tossing and turning. I eventually took some tums to see if that would help- it didn't.
Brian was out with his friends so I called him and asked him to come home because I didn't feel very good. Its not like he could really do anything for me but I just knew that I would feel better having him at home.
Brian got home around midnight. I heard the garage door open and went outside to see him. He had stopped at the store and got me some Sprite, Gatorade and PB crackers to help my upset stomach. Literally as soon as I saw the food I became extremely nauseated and ran into the bathroom.
Lets just say it was not a pretty sight and my Chipotle came out looking kinda like it did when it went in. I know that throwing up is not like the craziest thing during pregnancy, but I hadn't thrown up before this at all while pregnant. At that point I wasn't sure if I should go to the ER or just ride it out... So I made Brian call the doc and ask him what to do. The on call doc wasn't one that I had seen before, but she said that I probably just ate something weird (the Chipotle) and that if I didn't feel better in the morning then I should go in and get checked out.
Luckily I felt just fine after I vomited. I was hungry, but my stomach didn't hurt anymore. I don't think it helped that my classroom has been about 85 degrees and I feel kinda icky all day. But anyways, not fun night and I have to be at work until 8pm tonight.
Monday, August 22, 2011
Sunday, August 21, 2011
Decisions Decisions
On Saturday Brian and I went to a birthing class at the hospital. I didn't know really what to expect out of the calss.... I figured we would learn some breathing techniques and generally what happens when babies are born.
Much to my surprise, we watched a few video segments of live births. I guess I was just not really prepared to see a 1980s video of a crotch and a head coming out of it. The class instructor asked us what we thought of the video after we saw it and I said, "It kinda makes me want a C-section!" I think she was a little surprised, but I think that I was a little bit serious.
There are pros and cons to each type of birthing situation and this is sorta what I came away with:
Vaginal:
For now, Baby A is being stubborn and hasn't flipped yet. From what I've read, it seems unlikely that she would have enough room to turn now that I am almost 32 weeks. If it were a single pregnancy then maybe there would be more room to flip, but with twins I'm just not so sure.
We go in for a growth ultrasound on Friday, Sept. 2nd when I will be 33weeks 2 days. I think that if Baby A still has her head in my ribs then we should go ahead and schedule a c-section and be done with it. If my water breaks before the scheduled date and she happens to flip..... great.... but if she doesn't, well then we will have a calm and scheduled c-section, not the possibility for an emergency one.
If there are any opinions out there, I'd like to hear them! This just all seems so crazy and now that its getting closer it all seems very scary!
Much to my surprise, we watched a few video segments of live births. I guess I was just not really prepared to see a 1980s video of a crotch and a head coming out of it. The class instructor asked us what we thought of the video after we saw it and I said, "It kinda makes me want a C-section!" I think she was a little surprised, but I think that I was a little bit serious.
There are pros and cons to each type of birthing situation and this is sorta what I came away with:
Vaginal:
- There can be lots of tearing (the lady said that she tore all the way to her anus! OUCH!
- You can have incontinence issues later ( I mean who really wants to pee themself all the time?)
- Your vagina may never be the same again... if you know what I mean
- It really is surgery and can lead to infection and ugly scars
- There's a chance that after having a c-section that you will always have to have one with future children
- Recovery time is supposedly longer
- You have to wait longer to actual hold the babies because you have an IV in one arm and monitors on the other one
- Getting cut open is just plain old scary!
For now, Baby A is being stubborn and hasn't flipped yet. From what I've read, it seems unlikely that she would have enough room to turn now that I am almost 32 weeks. If it were a single pregnancy then maybe there would be more room to flip, but with twins I'm just not so sure.
We go in for a growth ultrasound on Friday, Sept. 2nd when I will be 33weeks 2 days. I think that if Baby A still has her head in my ribs then we should go ahead and schedule a c-section and be done with it. If my water breaks before the scheduled date and she happens to flip..... great.... but if she doesn't, well then we will have a calm and scheduled c-section, not the possibility for an emergency one.
If there are any opinions out there, I'd like to hear them! This just all seems so crazy and now that its getting closer it all seems very scary!
Tuesday, August 16, 2011
Back to School!
Yesterday was out "official" day to go back to school. We had a district wide meeting and then some time to work in our classrooms. It was really nice to see everybody that I haven't seen since the last school year!! And there was lots of oogling over my belly which I actually kinda liked =)
On the downside, I haven't really been sleeping well. I've been struggling with Restless Leg Syndrome at night ..... Yes, I know it sounds like something silly but it really is no fun at all.
Yesterday I had to leave work a little early to go to a doctor's appointment. Baby A is still breech and Baby B is head down. He said it would be a race to see which one is going to "drop" if Baby A still doesn't turn. If Baby B comes out first a vaginal delivery is no problem, but if Baby A's little feet decide they want to come first, then its going to be a C-Section. Also, I told the doc I wasn't feeling the best and he said he'd do a strep test super quick and give me some antibiotics so that if I don't feel better in a few days then I can take them. Well, I left there forgetting to get my throat culture done and without the script for the antibiotics. I seriously blame it on the pregnancy brain. I am forgetting everything lately! So, I think I am going to call and get some antibiotics because I woke up today feeling even worse than I have been and I don't actually think I want to know if I have strep. If I do, that would mean that I would potentially have to miss the first day of school and writing sub plans for that would be an absolute nightmare!
On the downside, I haven't really been sleeping well. I've been struggling with Restless Leg Syndrome at night ..... Yes, I know it sounds like something silly but it really is no fun at all.
Yesterday I had to leave work a little early to go to a doctor's appointment. Baby A is still breech and Baby B is head down. He said it would be a race to see which one is going to "drop" if Baby A still doesn't turn. If Baby B comes out first a vaginal delivery is no problem, but if Baby A's little feet decide they want to come first, then its going to be a C-Section. Also, I told the doc I wasn't feeling the best and he said he'd do a strep test super quick and give me some antibiotics so that if I don't feel better in a few days then I can take them. Well, I left there forgetting to get my throat culture done and without the script for the antibiotics. I seriously blame it on the pregnancy brain. I am forgetting everything lately! So, I think I am going to call and get some antibiotics because I woke up today feeling even worse than I have been and I don't actually think I want to know if I have strep. If I do, that would mean that I would potentially have to miss the first day of school and writing sub plans for that would be an absolute nightmare!
Thursday, August 11, 2011
Full Circle
I don't know if you all remember, but during my first trimester I couldn't eat chicken (or really any meat) to save my life!
Last weekend Brian was out of town and I was at home by myself. Usually Brian does all the cooking (and he is an AWESOME cook!) and so I have become accustomed to not grocery shopping or cooking anything besides mac & cheese or a frozen pizza. Well, Saturday I went to the grocery store and bought lots of things that are tasty but that don't need cooking..... Naked Juice, fruit, cereal, ice cream, etc. I figured that would get me through until Monday morning when he got home, but I was so wrong! Sunday I was watching the Food Network (Cupcake Wars I think) and then a show came on about the best fried chicken all across the country. The power of suggestion really gets me sometimes and after I want to eat something, I just can't get it out of my head!
Now the easy solution would have been to go out and get some KFC or something like that, but I was pretty sure that was NOT going to be the "best" fried chicken I have ever had. There is this place called "White Fence Farm" that does have the best chicken........ and I could have gone there, but everybody I called to go with me was either busy or out of town. So what is the logical thing to do? Cry of course! I almost feel silly now thinking about it, but I cried and couldn't stop for probably an hour because I just really wanted some good chicken! I could have gone by myself, but dining alone is not really something I felt like doing in a super emotional state.
Last night, Brian and I finally went out to this place and had some chicken..... It was soooooo good! On top of that, they apparently have a deal that all public school teachers get 1/2 off their meal!! I had no idea! That made it even better. At this "restaurant" they also really do have a small farm with animals that you can feed, little boutiques, a shop with candy and pies and all sorts of other neat stuff! We ended up feeding the animals (which Brian was afraid of and he did it anyways!) and watched the cow literally try and steal a woman's sweater she was holding! She had to do a little tug of war with with cow so that it would let go. Hilarious! We also bought a strawberry rhubarb pie and some taffy to take home. Its a super cute place and there were tons of families there (they have a tree house and playground for the kids too!) I can't wait to take the girls there!
Last weekend Brian was out of town and I was at home by myself. Usually Brian does all the cooking (and he is an AWESOME cook!) and so I have become accustomed to not grocery shopping or cooking anything besides mac & cheese or a frozen pizza. Well, Saturday I went to the grocery store and bought lots of things that are tasty but that don't need cooking..... Naked Juice, fruit, cereal, ice cream, etc. I figured that would get me through until Monday morning when he got home, but I was so wrong! Sunday I was watching the Food Network (Cupcake Wars I think) and then a show came on about the best fried chicken all across the country. The power of suggestion really gets me sometimes and after I want to eat something, I just can't get it out of my head!
Now the easy solution would have been to go out and get some KFC or something like that, but I was pretty sure that was NOT going to be the "best" fried chicken I have ever had. There is this place called "White Fence Farm" that does have the best chicken........ and I could have gone there, but everybody I called to go with me was either busy or out of town. So what is the logical thing to do? Cry of course! I almost feel silly now thinking about it, but I cried and couldn't stop for probably an hour because I just really wanted some good chicken! I could have gone by myself, but dining alone is not really something I felt like doing in a super emotional state.
Last night, Brian and I finally went out to this place and had some chicken..... It was soooooo good! On top of that, they apparently have a deal that all public school teachers get 1/2 off their meal!! I had no idea! That made it even better. At this "restaurant" they also really do have a small farm with animals that you can feed, little boutiques, a shop with candy and pies and all sorts of other neat stuff! We ended up feeding the animals (which Brian was afraid of and he did it anyways!) and watched the cow literally try and steal a woman's sweater she was holding! She had to do a little tug of war with with cow so that it would let go. Hilarious! We also bought a strawberry rhubarb pie and some taffy to take home. Its a super cute place and there were tons of families there (they have a tree house and playground for the kids too!) I can't wait to take the girls there!
The yummiest chicken in town!
Monday, August 8, 2011
29 Week Ultrasound
I have been going in every 4 weeks for a growth ultrasound to make sure that the babies are growing appropriately. Last Wednesday when I went in the babies were doing great!! Baby A is now 3lbs 3oz with a heart rate of 168 and Baby B is now 3lbs 6oz with a heart rate of 154. They are around the 60th-70th percentile as far as weight and are measuring about a week ahead. The Ultrasound Tech also did a biophysical profile.... she looked at how they are breathing and moving around and everything looked fine there too! Baby A is still breech and baby B is transverse (sideways.) So, hopefully Baby A will flip around OR Baby B will get lower than Baby A so she would come out first. I'm not totally opposed to a c-section, but I would really rather not get cut open. I hear the recovery time is longer and you aren't supposed to lift anything for a while which would be pretty difficult with twins. My cervix is also longer than last time... it was right around 5cm.... I didn't know that could happen!
I will be 30 weeks on Wednesday and that means only 8 weeks or less until I get to meet these girls!!! The weeks are flying by!
I will be 30 weeks on Wednesday and that means only 8 weeks or less until I get to meet these girls!!! The weeks are flying by!
Thursday, August 4, 2011
Back to Work!
School doesn't start until August 18th (August 15th for teachers) but three days never seems like enough to get two classrooms ready. Today I went in to get some things done and get a bunch of copies done before everyone else gets back. I only worked from 7:30-2pm including a lot of chatting with people I haven't seen all summer and eating lunch. I got home around 2:30, sat down and woke up at about 5! Yikes! I guess lately I have been getting up whenever, waiting until noon or so to get ready for the day and then doing a whole lot more of whatever I feel like! (Which usually includes at least one nap.)
I am going back in to my other school tomorrow and will probably go in and get a few things done next week as well. Hopefully this will get me ready to work full, super long days!
I am going back in to my other school tomorrow and will probably go in and get a few things done next week as well. Hopefully this will get me ready to work full, super long days!
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