I feel like this year there already have been and there will be a lot of changes. Good changes. My family has already expanded from 4 to 6 and that was a BIG change. We had to learn how to do pretty much everything differently. If I was home by myself on the weekend or in the evening I could just pick up and go somewhere. Now, I need to plan in advance even when I'm going to go to the grocery store because taking 4 kids under 2 is just not an option. For the record, I did go somewhere with all 4 kids by myself a couple weeks ago and it took me about 2 hours to get ready. I'm hoping to cut that down this Friday when I go out again.
I'm also ready to make some other types of changes in my life. I might be making a huge career change that I will talk more about when I've made it "official." I've began changing how we live. We have so much crap in our house and I just want to get rid of all of it. This happens a lot where I decide I'm going to de-clutter... get it started for a few days and then give up because its just too much. So, for now, I'm just trying to get rid of one crap pile at a time. Today it happened to be the crap pile under my kitchen table. Maybe if it doesn't seem so overwhelming I will get it all done... eventually. Even if it takes me a year, it would be worth it.
I also want to change my activity level. I mean, if I'm going to stay young enough to keep up with 4 kids I need to be in better shape. I'm thinking about getting a cheap treadmill or something just so that I can do something. I'm not looking to be a marathon runner or anything, but perhaps I could give myself the goal of a 5K sometime in the next 18 months. I would also like to get rid of the extra flab that I accumulated from the boys. They sure did a number on my body and I can't get rid of it from just hanging out at home. Balance in my life goes along with that also. I think its important to try and get some "me" time. That could be going out with a friend and getting a pedicure, or just escaping to the grocery store without any kids.
There are also some broken relationships that need to be mended. There are a lot of conversations that need to be had when the time is right. Its hard when so many issues have been buried for so many years, but I think we will be able to work things out.
I've also been working on changing my attitude about things. I'm trying to be calm, relaxed, and not let things get to me. I once got upset about someone cutting strawberries the wrong way. Was that a big deal? No, but it just bothered me. I like things done the way I like them done and I know that's a problem when people come over and try to help out. I need to just let them help and not let things done their way bother me. I'm sure I have some OCD and I acknowledge that and am working on fixing that. When Brian loads the dishwasher and puts things in weird places I tend to re-arrange it before I run it. Will the dishes be clean the way he loaded it? Sure. Stupid, I know. The first step is admitting I have a problem, right? Well there it is.
3 comments:
I hate when my husband changes the dishwasher when I load it. To be honest, it's my excuse not to load it anymore. What's the point if he's just going to change it? Hope you can let go of control and get some time to yourself. I imagine it must be a bit crazy being a mommy to two sets of twins.
Sounds like you have some positive changes happening! Just remember to take it one day at a time. I always have to tell myself (whether it's my weight or piles of laundry or mountains of clutter in the kitchen) that ______ didn't get this way overnight (or in a week or month or year!) so don't expect it to change that quickly. Be kind to yourself; you have a lot going on. =) But I know you can accomplish anything you set your mind to!! xoxo
If that's OCD, I have it too. My husband will load the dishwasher and I rearrange it. He never organizes it well enough to get all the dishes in! Lol. And when people came over the first month to "help" it just about drove me crazy, because I couldn't find things in my own home. Now that I'm getting roughly 4 hours of sleep a night, I can manage the household chores to a degree. But I still feel like the baby straps me to the couch. He feeds every three hours and it takes him about an hour to finish a bottle (dr calls him a lazy drinker). I look forward to your future post to inspire me to get off the sofa!
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